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10 Habits of Highly Successful Mothers

“Success” is an ambiguous term to me. How does one measure success? How does one define it? Is success how much money we have in our bank account? Is it how much we have accomplished in our professional life? Perhaps success is the amount of education we earned? Or maybe success is how bright our future paths are…Being first and foremost a mother (in addition to the others duties of my life), the concept of success is one I measure (most of the time), by the happiness and achievements of my children and husband, rather than myself. Looking at success through this lens can be a slippery slope; what if, perhaps, one’s child goes through a naughty phase- does this make the mother unsuccessful? I think not.
But, when your primary energy, time and commitment are targeted toward the health and well-being of those around you, measuring yourself to their achievement is inevitable. I carefully study successful people. Women who are able to achieve motherly success (i.e. their children are super in school, sports, arts and wonderfully behaved), in addition to professional success and marital success are truly captivating to me. I wonder what they think when they meet me, “This woman is does she keep asking me questions….” Well, I am trying to learn learn learn. I love to listen to the little gold nuggets that people do not even know they possess. Little do they know that I grab each little nugget and keep it to review later…(Is that creepy?)
These are the top 10 Little Gold Nuggets of Success which I have carefully extracted from women all over the country:
1. Efficiency is key
There are only 24 hours in the day for all of us. So how is it that some people simply get more done than others? They don’t waste time doing things that someone else can do. When it’s appropriate and the budget allows for it, bring in the reinforcements to do your mundane tasks to give you more time. Successful women schedule carefully and say no to anything that doesn’t work in the schedule.
2. Plan Long-term
Successful women anticipate the needs of the children, their husbands, their jobs, and the school picnic. The most successful women I know have their calendars mapped out for the year.
3. Don’t sweat the drama
There is one thing that women from all generations and all parts of the world share, and that is drama. Sensitivity to everything that is said, goes on, and transpires will ruin even the most focused woman. Do not get involved in nonsense. (I even go so far as to avoid news during the workday so I am not distracted by natural disaster.)
4. Keep the children on the forefront
You can be wildly successful with your career, but if you come home to a crying child because you were the only mother who didn’t come for the Mother’s Day Music Show you have had it. Staying on top of your child’s basic needs and even the most trivial event is important. Schedule time with your child if you must. Create a day a week that is for your children and only them. Carve out time every day to spend real one-on-one time with them. Being in the same room doesn’t count!
5. Stay connected to your husband
If your marriage fails, your children’s life will fall apart. Period. End of story. I’m not suggesting that you can’t piece it back together again but it will take time and healing. Prevent it by staying focused on being connected to your spouse.
6. Don’t overspend, overeat, overdrink
Keep a check on health, on your spending, on your social life. Inventory it weekly. If life spirals out of control in one of these areas, your entire life will suffer.
7. Commit
When your child is on a basketball team and wants to stay home to play with his friends, tell him no and remind him of his commitment to his team. He can play with his friends when he gets home. Committing and staying committed is a key strength to anyone who is successful at anything. Success takes hard work, which can only be achieved through commitment.
8. Say No
People who say yes to everything create an impossible scenario for success. Do not volunteer to be the homeroom mom if you are working 60 hours a week; you will be unsuccessful at work, home and school. People who recognize when they are maxed out are always appreciated for their gracious “no I’m sorry I am over committed” statement. It’s a gift to everyone around you when you say no, and bow out.
9. Baby Steps
Every major achievement is preceded by a series of very small achievements. You cannot achieve success without …

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8 Guilty Pleasures For Mothers

Now, listen up dads, this article is for you as much as for mums. You see, Mums will need you to step in for her to indulge in these guilty pleasures. I’m here for the mums, so if you’re a harassed dad, I apologise but know that we mums do sympathise with you.

Now, enough for my disclaimer.

As mums, I feel that there’s many pressure put upon me that sometimes I feel I don’t know myself anymore. I’m a driver to ferry my children around from one activity to another. I’m a cook, I’m a nurse, a live-in cleaner, a teacher and of course a wife to support my husband and keep him company. And looking at celebrity mum, I must also look stunning every day. With that, I fail miserably.

If you’re like me and other mums in the world, you probably feel guilty if for just one minute, you indulge yourself. But a number of research found that it’s important for a mother to find time for herself because happy mothers have happy children and happy family.

Before my words get twisted, I don’t suggest that mothers should over indulge themselves, go to the bar every night or shop until they drop and there’s no more money left for the family. That’s over indulgence and just pure irresponsible.

So, here are the 8 guilty pleasures that you can indulge to help you find yourself and without breaking your bank balance.

Lie in bed on Saturday morning until 10:00 AM. Yes, once a week, indulge in this great pleasure of not getting up in the morning to rush and get the kids’ breakfast ready. Allow your husband to do the work, it will give him time to bond with the kids while you get a much needed rest.

Curl up in the sofa with a good book. If you’re feeling totally harassed and fed up, get your husband to look after the kids, find a quite room and curl up with a very good book you’ve been wanting to read.

Have a warm relaxing bath before going to bed. This is very easy to do. Let the husband do a bit of tidying up in the kitchen while you have a good soak in the bath to relieve all your tension.

Get a cleaner. Yes, once a week or every fortnight get someone to do the cleaning for you. Even if this means you have to sacrifice other luxuries, this is one luxury that is worth having.

If your child is not yet at school, send your child to day care at least one day a week even if you are not working. This is one of the best guilt trippers especially for stay at home mums. However, studies also reveal that children who go to day care are often more confident than children who stay at home.

Have your hair done every month even if you think you don’t need it. This is to remind you that you are still a beautiful woman. If you can’t really afford it, why not have a spa day at home. (More on this topic later.)

Get a baby sitter and go out with your husband once a month. This will keep the romance alive between you and your husband. Remember, you are not just parents but you are a couple too.

Get your husband to give you a massage once a week. Not only will this relax you but it will also help bring you closer together.

Now, enjoy!…