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The Evil Sister-In-Law

The evil sister-in-law can pose big family problems – what’s a family to do when one person comes along and has the power and the inclination to wreck every function she is invited to? Don’t invite her!
Easier said than done when she’s the wife of your brother (she seemed so nice when they were dating). Apparently there are a lot of ‘evil’ sisters-in-law at large out in the world of families – some of them hate the family functions and outings – maybe there are too many or every Sunday doesn’t leave too much weekend time to explore other avenues of entertainment with her hubby. What might start out as a happy family unit can turn over bearing if there is too much closeness and expectations abound if you’re expected to show up at every single gathering.
Often, we hear from the family about the outsider, your brother’s wife, but not so often do we get to hear things from her side. Perhaps one family member could have a heart-to-heart and try to get to the origin of the matter, especially if she wasn’t always a b___.
Has someone in the family made her feel unwelcome, made fun of her, and offended her in some way? Unless she is asked, who’s to really know, especially if her husband isn’t telling.
There are as many different types of sister-in-law problems as there are families that have them. They might come across as ignorant to others needs and are unable to see another’s point of view or way of life as different but OK, from their own. Many people with these characteristics have no desire to participate in group talk or discussion mainly because they’re really unable to contribute anything of value.
One problem not to be tolerated is unwarranted rudeness toward the parents of the son, ever. They bore and raised up her spouse, out of respect for him and his family, she has to refrain from treating them with nastiness and disrespect. This type of behavior must be addressed sooner than later, not sugar-coated – get in her face about her nastiness and what effect it has on the entire family.
She then can choose to refrain, change, or retreat from family gatherings altogether so the family can continue to enjoy the company of each other.
Often people are unaware of how they are seen by others – bring her behavior to her attention, make a united stand and she will either have an attitude adjustment and change, or fade away. A win-win solution either way, I think.…

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Parent/teacher Conference Success

My son?s first ?real? parent conference is scheduled for today. Why am I so nervous? Certainly, as a teacher, I?ve conducted hundreds of parent conferences over the years ? conference time, for us was a nice short day, where either you could get your extra work done, or chat with the teacher next door. Now, I?m on the other side of the desk and I?m working to prepare myself for the 15 min face to face. Yes, I?m one of THOSE moms. Couldn?t you tell?

A parent/teacher conference is only as successful as you, the parent, make it. It makes no sense to let the teacher do all of the talking if you have questions about your child?s performance in school. The teacher knows how your child acts in school ? you may have questions on how to bridge that gap and how you and the teacher can create a successful student together. The parent/teacher conference is not the time to bring up something your child said happened three weeks ago or last month in the lunchroom. Any issues that your child brings home to you should be addressed at that time, when the facts are fresh. Use this fifteen minute window of time to gain as much insight to your child?s school performance as you can.

In order to be prepared for your conference, here are some questions that you can bring with you to ask. Don?t be afraid to take notes, to appear like a Type A over achieving parent. This is the image you want to project- by allowing the teacher to realize that you?re on your game, will compel him/her to be on his/her game when it comes to your child. Take it from a former teacher ? there?s nothing that we liked more than a responsive parent who actually paid attention to what was said in the conference and acted on it. In addition, talk with your child before the conference ? ask him/her if there are any questions s/he wants you to ask

Here are some questions (in no particular order) that you might want to ask your child?s teacher. Feel free to pick and choose the questions that you need as some questions are more appropriate for older or younger grade levels. I have also uploaded it in a PDF for easy printing.

? What are my child?s strengths and weaknesses? What is her best/worst subject?

? What can I do to continue to support my child at home? Do you have any suggestions for materials, books, activities etc that we can use to help him?

? How does she get along with the other students? Other teachers?

? **Are there any indications of a disability or other issues? (i.e. speech, vision, hearing, learning, motor control, ADD, ADHD etc.)

? Does my child show any special abilities or affinities for art, music, writing, acting?

? When is the best time to contact you? Would I be able to contact you via e-mail?

? Are there any school/community programs from which he might benefit?

? Are there any skills that need reinforcement at home?

? How does she handle taking tests?

? Does he work well independently?

? How can I continue to support what you do in the classroom at home?

Side note: **DO NOT, I repeat, DO NOT be afraid to ask this question. It is better to catch these issues early than to let them continue to affect your child?s achievement.

These are all the questions that we may think to ask when we come in for the conference, but forget to ask in the course of conversation! Print it out, take your paper in, don?t be ashamed to be a ?note taker? and a type A parent. Believe me, the teachers appreciate it.

Happy Conferencing!…

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Photograph Psychology – What Stance You Make Says So Much About You

In this day and age, only a handful of people do not possess a camera. Be it from a build-it cell phone camera to those hard to understand not to mention expensive SLRs. It is time to check out if the people you have captured are actually telling a hidden story.
Most of the time you’d whip up a camera when there is a family gathering right? Try to analyze this situation when capturing family portraits:
– Do they stick so closely together?
– Is there one member who stands a little away from the entire group?
– Are there poses that look so similar?
This is so dominant in a family that feels to tight-knit that they actually look like flowers that are all bunched up in a vase as if they would wilt if separated. They actually mirror each other’s mannerisms and how they smile or tilt their heads. Even in a happy family, there is still the odd one out. This family member would be standing a little away from the huddle and would want to either stay in front or at the very end.
Pictures are definitely worth a thousand words and can tell a story about you and your family.
By paying attention to these small details, you’d see the confidence levels of the people you are taking photos of. If there is one member who loves staying in the middle and has this particular glow in the eyes and has the widest smile, he or she happens to be the happiest, most confident and of course, shutter addict in the family.…

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5 Common Habits of Happy Families

What makes some families more happy than others? The short answer is they are aware of doing things that make them happy. They have probably taken the time to explore what they like to do, what makes the members of the family happy and importantly make the time to do those things more regularly than the things that they don’t particularly enjoy.
It sounds simple and it is. It is about not being lazy! People who are happy are more aware!
Aware of what you may ask, and that’s a great question. Individuals in the family are aware of what they like and actually go out regularly and simply do those things. Most importantly, they do those things together. Hence the saying has arisen that the family that plays together, stays together!
Here are 5 common habits of happy families.
1 Being Grateful for everything in their lives. Having gratitude for the things that they have. Gratitude comes from an awareness of acceptance of what life is offering to each of us at any given moment. If you do not have acceptance in the present moment, than it is more difficult to be grateful. Acceptance and gratitude are the foundations for enthusiasm which brings for the feelings we all desire which is happiness.
2 Acceptance of the consequences of our choices and finding an appropriate level of satisfaction leads to happiness. When you have the habit of acceptance or satisfaction of what happens, you enjoy life more. People who try and “maximse” everything that they engage in are usually to wrung out at the end of the day to enjoy anything. They are never satisfied and are continually chasing their tail, so to speak. Simply limit the number of choices on offer to you is helpful.
3 Focusing on one thing at a time is a habit for happy families. The power to pay attention to what you as a family are wanting is a great habit to engage in because it limits the choices, focusses each family member and everyone can take some ownership of the family experience.
4 Simply being together and hanging out together. Being comfortable with not doing things all the time.
5 Love yourself first and then love your family by spreading the magic of love in each moment. Human beings thrive on close personal relationships. Human beings do not like to be on their own most of the time.
So it is in the understanding and being aware of the things we do regularly as a family unit that offer the level of satisfaction or happiness of being part of a happy family. From here you can live a rich life.…

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How to Save a Marriage

Psychological incapacity, physical abuse, incompatibility, lack of communication, lack of time for each other, and financial constraints. These are among the problems encountered in relationships, that’s why there are lots of broken marriages. It seems hard to solve these problems but I tell you, there’s one thing you can do to take away the burden of getting answers to the question: how to save a marriage.
God. He knows everything, even how you can start solving the problem in your marriage. It may be hard to deal with the marriage problem but you can always pray that God will enable you to change things for the better. You cannot change all things but God can. Apparently, you cannot change your partner neither yourself. You need to surrender it all to God and start listening to His instructions. It is not about your plan, it is about what He wants for you. He knows best.
It going to be too hard to fix a broken marriage when you both need to change things in yourselves, but only God can change everything. Do not expect that He will always do what you want because He has a great plan even for your marriage. Know what He wants and what He says about your situation by reading His word.
As you wait on God, learn how to listen to His instructions. Some things may be hard, but that’s the way it goes. You need to be strong. You cannot easily have gold for it needs to go through the process of extensive heating, melting, and evaporating. If you desire to save your marriage and your partner is not cooperative, don’t lose hope. God will make a way, when there seems to be no way. He has a perfect solution on how to save a marriage.
God may lead you to examine what is wrong with your marriage. It is always important that you speak to your partner as soon as possible but never force him/her. Wait upon God. Meanwhile, if he/she is not available to talk, you can try doing things that will please him/her.
It may take a lot of sacrifices to win your partner’s heart again but it is possible that your spouse will come to realize that the marriage should have to work out. In God’s time, you will just see that it is not just you alone who is making things work out. It will be a partnership between you, your spouse, and God.
Face changes with not turning back. You need to make sure that you have been renewed genuinely and be brave enough to take the challenge to keep the long-term changes. All these will be seen by your spouse for sure, and it may drive him/her to face changes as well.
The problem in how to save a marriage is not hard at all. What is difficult is surrendering it all to Him. Once you have less of you and more of God, you will see that His control is perfect. He has great plans for you and your spouse. God is good.…

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How to Know If Your Kid is Really Smart

This is a question very common to parents, grandparents and even to aunt’s and uncle’s. So how would you really know if your kid or grandson/granddaughter or nice/nephew is really smart?

Determining if the child is smart is quite hard in the first one year and below since he/she can’t talk that well or express himself strongly, but as he/she grows you would know if he is really smart by observing the following signs…

Starts to reason out every time you correct him/her

Ask a lot of question and sometimes, his/her questions are something you can’t answer

Observes everything in his/her surroundings

Imitates you or whoever that he/she thinks is doing something cool or different

Loves to learn, you would find him/her asking you to teach him how to do something such as; read, write or spell

When you try to ask him/her a question you would find his/her answers pretty amazing and you would end up wondering where he/she got it

Understands your instructions and will never whine in front of other people

Always wants to take the lead and be ahead of other kids but also knows how to give way

You would see him/her educating other kids if that kid did something not really nice

Does what he/she is told but you would always see him/her doing something out of curiosity

Now these are just one of the many signs you can see from a smart kid, now let me just inform you that kids who are really bright tend to be really persistent on asking questions and would not stop until you give them an answer that will satisfy them. In this situation it pays to be extra patient and though they are getting into your nerves just think of the brighter side that you have a gifted child.…

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Tips And Pointers For Getting Through Your Pregnancy

Many mothers-to-be focus their attention on the changes that will occur in their lives after the baby is born. The nine months that you have to go through before that moment, however, are a time when you’ll be changing quite a bit. Keep reading for tips and advice on getting through your pregnancy healthfully and happily.

Remember that your bladder will not be able to contain as much fluid as before during pregnancy. Drink during the morning and afternoon, but slow down at dinnertime. This will help reduce the need to get up during the night to use the restroom.

Start exercising now. If you have healthy habits now they will continue during pregnancy. Exercise is important while you are pregnant because it keeps you healthy. It reduces the risk of having a miscarriage and also can make your labor easier. You should talk to your doctor before exercising while pregnant.

Inform any doctor before a medical procedure if you are pregnant or planning on becoming pregnant. This includes your dentist as well. There are certain drugs that shouldn’t be given and procedures that shouldn’t be done for a woman who is pregnant or on her way to pregnancy.

If you have an upset stomach early in your pregnancy, eating small meals frequently may help. Try eating foods that soothe upset stomachs. The foods you consume should be both fresh and light. You might be surprised by the difference you feel when you eat fresh veggies, fruits and lean cuts of meat.

A good thing to do when pregnant is to see your practitioner on a regular basis. This will not only help you in knowing about the things that pregnant people should know but it also will help you in knowing how to have a healthy pregnancy. This act can help in having a very smooth pregnancy.

You should attend pregnancy classes as soon as you find out you are pregnant. This allows you to feel confident that you know what is coming. It is also a great chance to talk to an experienced person who can answer your questions.

One of the best things that you can do in order to have a healthy pregnancy is to stop smoking. It might be hard at first, but this will enable you to have a very healthy baby. There are many programs out there that can help you to get rid of this very bad addiction.

Baby-Sitting

It is important to learn how to take care of a newborn. Babysitting other people’s toddlers and newborns is a great way to learn this experience. Caring for other people’s newborns not only helps make some money on the side but also gives you the life skills you need to take care of your own child.

Mom And Baby

Exercising during pregnancy is good for mom and baby. The benefits include decreased risk for gestational diabetes, less complaints of constipation and back pain and a quicker recovery from birth for mom. Stop exercising and see your doctor if you have signs, such as shortness of breath, dizziness, fluid leaking, uterine contractions or vaginal bleeding.

As stated before, pregnancy is full of questions and concerns for expecting parents. The advice you’ve just read will hopefully be an assistance to you during your pregnancy so that you can know what to expect.…