When you show up with love in your heart, what is returned to you is pure love.
While I knew this piece of universal wisdom to be true, I never experienced it so profoundly as I did the other day. I flew to Miami to see my aging ailing Father. I have a good, although not very close, relationship with Dad.
My childhood was tumultuous. My parents went through a long drawn out battle of a divorce that left a lot of emotional debris. My father, who was a renowned neuro-psychiatrist went on to make some horrendous decisions in his personal life. His misguided thinking and its outcomes were splattered across the media headlines on more than one occasion. Other bad choices liquidated the wealth he had built up over his lengthy career.
I defined my Dad by these life-altering choices. Taking the lessons I learned with my as I watch his life experience crash and burn, I made different decisions – took different paths – in my own life. What I didn’t know, until the other day, that the greatest gift I would ever get would be from my Dad.
This week my Dad taught me the following:
You do not know what you do not know
The natural human spirit creates life and faces the end of life with grace and dignity.
As long as there is breath in our lungs there are gifts in the lessons that can be learned – we continue to grow.
When you show up with love in your heart, what is returned to you is pure love.
In earlier visits with my Dad I showed up as if I was fulfilling a family obligation. I had my expectations about what the short time we spent together would be like and got exactly what I expected. Year after year. All I did was reaffirm what I thought to be true about my Dad and my relationship with him; Dad was a selfish SOB and he never knew or cared much for me.
This time I knew it might be the last time I would see him while he was still lucid. He’s bedridden and cannot see or hear very well. I prepared his tiny meals and fed him as I would any infant. Sitting at his bedside I decided that I would give him the gift of closure, peace of mind, so that he could let go comfortably. I decided to arrive in a state of love instead of expectation.
I wasn’t prepared for what I experienced. Here was a man who I thought was devoid of emotional tenderness, any interest in who I am as his daughter, and full of himself. Who I experienced was a man stripped of all ego, all parts of him that he used to cope with his own inner pain, freely expressing his truth. It was the most profound awakening I have ever witnessed. The awakening wasn’t within him. This new perspective came from within me. I woke up to who my Dad really is at his deepest core and it rocked my world.
Dad expressed the lessons he learned, his love for me, my siblings, his wife whom he was once estranged and his love of life. While his Alzheimer’s made it difficult for him to fully communicate what he wanted to say he spoke of his appreciation for life and all that it had to offer.
When his memory failed he would fill in the gaps with a little joke, a rhyme or pieces of an old song that surfaced out of nowhere. I was captivated and engaged as an observer and witness to the joy and delight that is my father. My time with him flew by and I longed for more. I kissed him goodbye when I left.
The flight home was tearful as I felt a wave of stuck toxic energy within me release itself. The resulting hole in my inner being was filled with love and appreciation for the resiliency, enormous power and inner wisdom that is the human spirit. I am grateful that I had learned enough of my own lessons to get out of my own way so that I could experience what I never thought know and love and be loved for who I am for and by my Dad.
I was completely wrong about who I thought my Dad was. His actions were always well intended yet his choices of execution were woefully misguided through his own Inner Critic, his own pain. Dad is a man filled with love for his children and his purpose in life, to heal others in pain. He never gave up his quest to become the man his heart longed to express. I was blessed to be a witness as he revealed …
When you show up with love in your heart, what is returned to you is pure love.
A nursery glider is a piece of baby furniture specially designed for the special needs of babies. Next to baby crib , a glider rocking chair is another important furniture in the nursery room. But, you should know that gliders come in different styles and designs. Choose the glider that suits your taste. It is helpful to know the things about baby gliders to help you decide which glider is appropriate for your baby.
Design: A good quality glider chair is produced by Little Castle glider. They use high quality, solid base hardwood rockers that could last for generations. All parts are guaranteed to withstand time and quality use. Little Castle has produced different designs of fully upholstered swivel chairs and recliner glider chairs. Each glider is handcrafted for superior quality. They have included detachable cushions for extra comfort and for quick replacements. Moreover, it is designed for superior comfort that can carry extra weight and widely spaced for ease of movements during feeding time.
Durability: A quality nursery glider should be made of high quality wood products. Little Castle glider, the name that dominate the market for the baby glider industry. It has a guaranteed smooth and long gliding range even for long hours of use. They see to it that their designs are consistent, and produced according to company standards. Made in the United States, each chair is made of closely spaced of nine gauge sinuous springs and steel tubular ring bases that allow greater stability of position and efficient swivel actions.
Beauty: Find a nursery glider that can last for years. Even if your child outgrows their gliding chair, Little Castle sees to it that it has quality and style that could easily adopt the latest fashion of ordinary chairs. You can be proud of your Little Castle glider, you can have it reupholstered to fit into your living room or office as an effective means to avail of quick nap anytime of the day. Just like your Nollie covers, the makers of quality infant seat covers, they use quality fabrics that can endure long hours of use, with gorgeous vibrant colors and shades for a customized design.
Gliding ottoman: Little Castle produces swivel and recliner glider chairs that come with gliding ottomans as well. They also have stationary ottomans for a variety of selection according to your need. They also provide gliding accessories like extra cushions, footstools and nursing pillows. Extra cushion increases comfort and convenience of use especially for heavy babies and grown up kids.
Safety: The traditional rocking chairs are prone to minor accidents like pinning, pinching of toes, fingers and even your pet’s paws and tails. With Little Castle glider, these worries are eliminated. The smooth horizontal movement of your nursery glider is superior over the rocking motions of your traditional rocking chairs.
Come and complete your nursery rom requirements! Include Little Castle glider in your list. You will have the best return of your investment that is… excellent bonding time with your baby and even your grown up kids who want extra attention from Moms and Dads.…
Moms are so much more powerful than they realize. How they are feeling on a particular day can have significant effects on the entire family. A Mom can and does influence so many things in her environment. And that can affect how she feels, and in turn how the other family members feel.
When she is feeling good, happy, relaxed so are her kids. They have more energy, laugh more and get along better. On the other hand, if she is feeling frustrated or bogged down by all the things going on, the kids seemed to know that, and they argued more, were hard to keep busy and were less focused.
What Mother hasn’t felt at her wits end with her kids? The colicky baby who won’t stop crying, the kids who won’t stop arguing, the lack of time she has to herself and the limited adult interaction. She’ll call a girlfriend or her own mother to talk for a few peaceful minutes to vent or to get advice. She will put the kids’ favorite movie on so they’re occupied and we can have a few minutes to ourselves. It would never fail, after a few minutes into a conversation the kids will start to call for Mom. They need to ask a question or they need a referee because, “he hit me,” or they want some juice. On it goes when a few minutes ago, they were fine. We try to appease them, even leave the room or multitask in some manner. When nothing seems to work we hang up feeling irritated and frustrated. Low and behold, all’s well and the arguing stops. It’s as if that big white device in our hand was a signal to start vying for mom’s attention, and in a way, to our children it was. Yet the feeling of frustration lingers for the mom, long after she has hung up and peace is restored. It can affect the rest of the day, and by the time our spouse comes home, she’s more than ready for them to help, even takeover.
It only makes sense then that our thoughts affect our relationships as well. Take this example, with a stay at home mom in mind. Their husbands are off at work, and their kids are off at school, so these moms spend their time doing as much as they can around the house. They will straighten, pick up, put away, clean or whatever needs to be done. If they walk around with negative thoughts, such as; “I am always picking up after everyone else,” and “no one puts anything away,” and “I always have to do everything myself” and “this house is such a mess” and “I never get to do anything I want” and on and on. By the time these people get home, they will be so worked up and upset, that they might yell about it, or want nothing to do with them. Either way it affects the entire rest of the day, for the whole family and in a very negative way. The frustration produces more frustration in others, spreading it around and bringing more of it into the home.
Being a mother and raising a family is one of the, if not the hardest thing a woman will ever do. It would be helpful if kids came with instructions, but they don’t. Therefore, a solid support system is essential for every mother because taking care of your home and your family is hard enough without leaving much room for self care. There are often feelings of frustration, isolation and an inability to do what they want. There are simple and effective things you can do to make all this easier and to feel more like ‘a happy mom.’ I have listed three of those ways below:
1. Schedule me time in to every day. Time for yourself is so critical because moms are called upon to give so much and to sacrifice so much that we need to replenish our energy ‘supply.’ We can be very quick to drop what we are doing for someone else that having ME time scheduled in to our day makes it more likely to happen. It is important for these activities to be quality, things that bring us joy and nurture our spirit.
Treat this time like a doctor’s appointment, one that you wouldn’t cancel on a whim. It is okay to say that you are busy or that you have other plans when others make requests during this time. I would also like to promote that moms don’t feel guilty for taking time for themselves either. You need to be cared for and nurtured in order to fully care for others, and feel good about it.
2. Connect with friends every day …
Tips for a smooth school year start with creating a shelf, a basket or an area by the front door for each family member to store what he or she will need the next morning. Then make the lunches for the next day the night before and refrigerate them. Check the weather report so you have in mind the clothing items needed for the next day, and already put these out the previous night as well. If you think about preparing a fancy healthy breakfast for the next day, prepare what you can the night before and just re-heat everything the next morning. Start your families’ day the right way with a big healthy breakfast that will help you build a healthy happy family every day.
Preparing for school is a formidable task for both the parents and the children. After the holiday your children probably have developed some bad habits like sleeping late at night, and waking up later and being glued to the television set for most of the day. Now you on the other had also have to wake up extra early to get the kids ready for school, and to get them to school on time. According to some studies parents who prepare their children for the transition between holiday and school can help ease stress for the whole family.
Establish some rules before the school year begins again. Lay down some firm rules about waking up times, going to sleep times and doing homework times for example. With this have a meeting with the children and also take in to consideration their input.
Build a healthy family and break the bad habits. And number one on your list should be your children’s sleeping and waking up times. You can make the transition from holiday to school bedtimes easier by making them go to bed 15 minutes earlier each night for about two weeks before school starts.
Reinforce the right behavior and build a healthy happy family. To keep your children on the right track, reward them to keep them motivated. For example, let them sleep a bit later on weekends if they adhere to the rules during the week.
Ease your child’s worries and anxieties about the school year. Children have a lot to content with in their schooling career, peer pressure and bullying for example. A good way to give your child control over the uncertainty is to confront them in the beginning of the school year, and to involve them in preparations, such as letting them choose their lunch menus.
Get them to eat healthy family meals and build a healthy family. Family meals are a comforting ritual for the family. It adds predictability to life and relief from the stresses we all encounter every day. An also according to research, children who eat healthier are more likely to eat fruits, vegetables, grains and are less likely to snack on unhealthy foods and also less likely to smoke, use marijuana or drink alcohol. Give them good healthy food and build a healthy happy family.
Work on your marriage and build a healthy happy family. With the ever alarming increasing rate of divorce these days, parents need to work on making their relationship more than ok, for themselves and for the sakes of their children. Parents are the foundation of the home, to build a healthy family. Parents are the model of how relationships should be for their children. Marriage takes a lifetime to perfect, so see how far you get this year. Therefore to build a healthy happy family, parents need to stay independent. To have separate interests is a good thing; it ensures you have something unique to bring to the conversation. Experiencing the same thing day after day gets really dull. Do not take each other for granted, everyone needs to feel needed and wanted. Tell and who your partner how important they are to you every day. Talk to each other more often, share everything that happens to you in your day to day life, and get closer to each other and build a healthy family. Be intimate with each other; do not get boring once you have kids. Be the same people that you once were. Book a babysitter and go on dates with each other occasionally, of even stay over at a hotel for the night.
Then just remember to keep your goals for your family in mind throughout the year, implement and think of them regularly even as the excitement of the New Year starts to wear off. Your reward will be a happier, healthier and richer family life. Start today to build a healthy family.…
When you are bound by family responsibility
Family is very important. And when something arises that takes you away from your family you have to say ‘no’. Breaking a family relationship because of career moves or explicit affairs that you have decided to say ‘yes’ because you think you will be happy is an irresponsible decision. You take your back against your responsibility to your family because you decided to have your own happiness. But when you realize that you made a wrong decision, it would be too late to return. What you need to do is to pick up the pieces where you left if and start putting it all together again. If you only said ‘no’ and take your responsibility, you could have found a way to be happy
When your principle in life is questioned
Great people have principles in life that made them what they are. If you are a politician and decisions must be made that may clash against your principle in life, say ‘no’. You may have the power and influence at the moment because you said ‘yes’ but at the end of the day when you are all alone, sleeping would be difficult. You can’t sleep peacefully at night because you have compromised your principle in life in order to retain your power. Remember that people voted for you and trusted you because you have presented to them the principle in life that they wanted as well.
When your self worthiness is at stake
Do not bet your character in a stake that will make you worthless. Just say ‘no’ and you can retain your own worthiness. If your peers are influencing you to go beyond the legal means in order to get rich and famous at the expense of your personality, say ‘no’. Do not wage your pride for something that will lower your character.
When you are no longer happy
Say ‘no’ and admit to yourself that you are no longer happy. Do not continue the pretensions and say ‘yes’ all the time. It’s okay to give up and have the happiness in your heart. They can say all they want against you but they will never know what will make you happy. It will free you from the guiltiness in your heart.
When you are exhausted
It’s okay to say ‘no’ when you are already exhausted. After all you are the owner of yourself, and you alone know what you feel. If you are physically exhausted from work take time to rest and recover your energy. Don’t abuse your body by saying ‘yes’ to activities that requires your energy. Its okay to say ‘no’ and they will understand.
When you are hurt
When you are hurting and the pain is too much to handle, say ‘no’ to someone who caused you pain and recover your feelings because it’s the only way to face the world again. The pain will not go away if you continue to say ‘yes’ to the emotional battering you encounter. Make a decision and stop the pain. You must help yourself in order for other people to help you.…
Buying your first home is obviously a very big step and there are a number of different things that you perhaps have to try and take into consideration so things go smoothly. There are different people who can give you advice but this is intended to just give you some things to think about so you should be as well organised as possible.
Of course you have to work out what you can afford first of all as this is going to really decide what kind of houses you are going to be able to look at. You can get a lot of information from going to talk to someone who deals with mortgages as, unless you are very rich, you shall require to get one in order to buy your home.
They look at what your income is and they shall be able to tell you the kind of level of mortgage that you would be able to qualify for and then you shall know the kind of things you are able to go and see. Once you have this information you then need to look at what is available and you can do this at home thanks to the internet.
There are a number of property websites available for you to look over and the good thing is they allow you to search according to various criteria. This means you can then look at houses according to price, location, type of house, and even number of bedrooms so you are then rather quickly looking at only those properties available that suit your requirements.
Although the internet is able to give you a good first impression of a potential home it is important that you go and see it in person. The good part is that due to you doing so much work at home and creating a potential short list you can arrange a full day of viewing with the different estate agents so you are not wasting too much time.
You have to make sure that the mortgage broker you use is fully certified to handle it and you should visit them at their office as this can tell you a lot about how professional they are to deal with. You can of course compare what they say with what another broker says so you know you are able to trust their advice as trust does play such an important role in all of this.
You must remember that they are going to be dealing with large sums of money for you as a good mortgage broker shall be handling every aspect on your behalf apart from adding your signature to paperwork. It can therefore be very useful to just get some references from people you know personally who have just bought a home and ask them not just who they used but how they felt they got on with their broker.
So you can see that buying your first home just involves the same things as someone buying one for the third or fourth time. As long as you do not rush things and get the correct advice from the best possible people then the entire process should go fine.…
Parenting is the most difficult and thankless job anyone can hold. Whether you have a strong support group to go to for advice or you are on your own, figuring out what to do with your child can be a difficult and sometimes, frightening experience. Read the tips in this article for suggestions on parenting techniques and ideas.
If your toddler is trying to climb out of his or her crib, lower the mattress if it is possible. This is because if a child is able to climb out of their crib, and they fall out, they could seriously injure themselves. Also, make sure to remove crib bumpers.
A great parenting tip is to not try and lay guilt on your child all the time. If you are always trying to make your child feel guilty for something they have done or haven’t done, your child will develop a complex and will greatly resent you for it.
If children live in your house, you should never smoke indoors. Actually, maybe you could quit completely! The effects of secondhand smoke can often be as bad as smoking a cigarette directly. Second-hand smoke increases the risks of asthma and various respiratory conditions in children.
To make hair washing an easier process, pretend like your child is visiting a hair salon. Allow her to lay her head up to the sink and place a towel underneath her neck. Give your child a head massage while you are rinsing her hair. Engaging in imaginative play, will make this task fun for your child.
Make sure to give your twins time with you that they don’t have to share. All too often twins are thought of as one complete unit. They are separate people and they need time to discover who they are on their own. Make time each week to take one twin to the park or the store with you.
As a parent one should make sure to set time aside specifically for the family. This is important for maintaining a happy and close family, because with our busy lives it is easy to let other outside activities such as sports and work get in the way.
As unfortunate an event it may be, divorces happen all of the time. In order for you, a divorced parent, to hold a good relationship with your college aged and older children you must never get them in the middle of your divorce. This will push them away for you and your ex-spouse.
Mom And Baby
Look into slings and baby carriers designed for twins. They do exist, and they are fabulous. There is a learning curve for getting two babies into a carrier, but the benefits to mom and baby are enormous. Wearing your babies will allow you to get things done with your hands free, and the twins get the emotional connection and intellectual stimulation from being right with you.
As stated earlier in this article, being a parent is a tough role for anyone. Apply the suggestions in this article to help make this difficult job, a bit easier. Whether you have one child or several, leveraging these tips gives you some additional choices, on how you interact with your children.…