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Balance Work and Family Tips

Happy Family Life – Facts and Myths

It is not easy to be a married couple. People always try to give you advice about something. Of course it is always done out of the best and noble motives. Naturally, it is all useless. Throughout the years of living together the couple inevitably breaks all the rules and taboos at least once. So how does it affect their life?
It is time to crush the most popular myths about family life. We have decoded the secret meaning of all the advice that husband and wife hear from the very first day they tie the knot.
So myth number one: you should not go to sleep without making up after a fight. Well, it sounds quite reasonable – why risk it, what if overnight the fight that has started over something trifle will only flare up and become a real problem? It is better to make up and go to sleep with a clear conciseness and have a fresh start the following morning.
Our opinion: just make a deal with your other half to postpone the continuation of the fight till the morning – especially if it is past midnight, you are exhausted, and there is no foreseeable end to the fight any time soon. After all, not every argument can be limited by time restrictions and unfortunately not all of us can stop at the right time.
Of course it is bad to go to sleep feeling irritated after the fight. But there are certain pluses to it too, even if sometimes you sleep on opposite sides of the bed or separate bedrooms, you will be OK – just as your marriage will be OK also.
The second myth is that the birth of the child makes you even closer with your spouse. Very often after the baby is born (especially if it’s the first baby) the spouses gain a countless number of subjects for conversations. Although all of them are connected to the baby one way or the other…
It seems like the relationship has risen to a new level, but then the husband leaves to work and the baby starts fussing or gets sick. The joy and amusement that this tiny being has aroused at first are gradually replaced with tiredness and irritation – what else can you expect after sleepless nights, nonstop breastfeeding, and diaper changes? Naturally, not a single decent mother will take her frustrations out on a baby, and the righteous anger falls on the one who happens to be nearby. And most often it is the beloved husband.
Our opinion: the birth of a child is above all a test of your relationship. Is there a solution? Yes. You should just accept the fact that all married couples go through a crisis and usually at the time when they expect it the least of all.
Furthermore, a woman needs help taking care of the baby – it is impossible to manage it on your own. The help and support of the loving husband do help a woman to not forget about the roles she has besides being a mother such as a role of a wife and a business woman. If a new mom still cannot even think about going out or is afraid to leave the baby with the dad, other family members, or a nanny, then do not rush things, let everything follow its course.
Another myth: a husband and wife should not only be in a romantic relationship, they should also be friends. It sounds great, doesn’t it? After all, a wife knows her husband better than anybody else, so why not consider him the best friend?
Our opinion: romantic relationship is different from a friendship. Do not have illusions that one person will manage to become a personification of both passionate love and fond friendship. It simply does not happen like that.
In other words, do not blame yourself if you do not feel a friendly attachment to your spouse – this is what you have your girlfriends/guy friends for. The important thing is to keep that connection with each other, and what you are going to call it is up to you. Always take an interest in your spouse’s life. When leaving in the morning, ask about your spouse’s plan for the day and when you see each other in the evening make sure to inquire about how the day went and how successful they were with their to-do-list.
The next myth is that unsatisfactory sex life is not a problem. The first few months after the baby is born, the hormones, exhaustion, and excessive irritability do not contribute to the improvement of your sex life, therefore you should not force things to happen. A husband should treat the situation with understanding and store up on patience.…

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General Article

3 Easy Steps to Get Your Child to Sleep All Night Long

3 Easy Steps to Get Your Child to Sleep All Night Long

It can be distressing to hear your child cry sobs of tears at bedtime and it pulls at your heartstrings that they fight against this rest time. I know, I empathise with you; I’ve been there and I’ve found an easy proven technique that quickly reassures children also bringing parents and children closer together in a very loving bond.

All around us in literature and history, we find paintings, drawings and images of Angels that walk before us, behind us and above us, invisibly watching over and protecting us all from harm.

In the last few decades more and more stories have emerged of accident victims walking away from disaster citing they ‘felt’ guarded and we hear stories of danger being averted because someone ‘felt’ inspired to move in the opposite direction following their ‘gut’ feeling thus avoiding disaster.

Step 1. Angel books with pictures are the best way to show your child about the visual depictions of Angel’s and what they may look like. They are the easiest way for you to introduce the look of Angels. Visit your local library or search images on the web and create your own vision board that can stay in your child’s room as a visual reminder of their Guardian Angels presence. Print out pictures of all drawings and painting of Angel’s that you like and also collect words such as Love, Peace, Hope, Safe, and glue this onto cardboard to make your child a collage picture for their room.

Step 2. As you read Angel stories place emphasis through the tone of your voice becoming softer, lighter and more relaxed beginning with what is known as the ‘dripping’ effect because you’ll repeat this process night after night. Eventually your child will begin to associate the story of Angels as one of joy for both of you to share regularly until they go to sleep confidently.

Step 3. Now it’s time to introduce your child’s personal Guardian Angel. When you know your child doesn’t want the connection between both of you to end, begin to speak in the affirmative, using your imagination to suggest what your child’s very own Guardian Angel might look like. Examples are: “Does your Guardian Angel have long hair?” or “do you think your Guardian Angel can run fast?”

As you engage and smile at their responses they will gain a sense of approval and allow themselves to continue to build with their imagination and use of creation in this self reassurance exercise.

Now through the affirming tone of your ‘matter of fact’ voice you will depart from their bedroom, re-affirming what the two of you have shared and confident in the knowledge that you are beginning the first step in the ‘dripping’ effect where night after night your tone and affirmations will create and increase comfort in your child’s mind, until your child replaces your words of reminder with their own thoughts of reassurance.…

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Parenting – What is Unconditional Love and How Does it Work?

Parenting – What is Unconditional Love and How Does it Work?

At its best, parenthood calls for an ability to love unconditionally. To love a child regardless of what he or she says or does takes maturity, selflessness and commitment. When you dedicate yourself to this style of parenting, you are providing an experience that will have long-lasting positive effects on the entire family. But conscientious parenting is hard, surprisingly hard. It requires a tremendous amount of generosity, dedication, and a willingness to give of yourself, at times, when you would really rather not.

What is unconditional love and how does it work? Unconditional love means affection is not based on outside circumstances. It’s never threatened or taken away. It’s not used as leverage or to manipulate.

Loving unconditionally isn’t about being permissive, nor does it mean approving of everything children do. It just means that whatever they do, even when you disapprove or get angry, kids know the issue is never about whether or not they’re loved. Love is both a spoken and unspoken certainty. When you’re able to love in this way, kids learn to feel good and special. What’s more, feeling loveable then becomes rooted into your child’s personality.

For the most part, unconditional love is unique between parents and children. Experience teaches that husbands and wives, friends and lovers do things to cause them to stop loving one another. They divorce, stop speaking, and break up fairly frequently. But if parents have the ability, the love between them and their children can survive acts of disloyalty, disrespect, or periods of neglect and even abuse. The ability of parents and children to forgive one another is truly remarkable but not absolute.

Despite the desire to love your children unconditionally, you may find yourself struggling to do so. Mothers and fathers, who grew up in an inconsistent and unreliable atmosphere themselves, often slip into creating a similar pattern with their own children, regardless of their intention to do otherwise.

Withdrawing love does often get kids to do what they’re told. However, when children cooperate because they fear being shamed or rejected, they’re doing so for the wrong reasons. Rather than acting out of respect for themselves and others, they’re afraid of being emotionally abandoned. This type of “cooperation” can lead to problems because it causes children to doubt their own self-worth.

Find a New Perspective

If loving unconditionally doesn’t come naturally, all is not lost. Rather than ignoring this problem, it’s a good idea to think more about it. Write down your concerns, talk about them with your partner, or share your thoughts with a friend. Instead of delegating your own childhood into the background, become more curious about how you grew up. The ways in which anger and love were expressed, when you were little, will influence the ways you’ll resolve conflicts and express your love as an adult.

The loss of parental love is life-defining. The devastating consequences are why it’s so important for mothers and fathers to manage their frustrations and disappointments without withdrawing affection or respect. Winning this internal battle and refusing to use love as a weapon helps children feel good about themselves – which is really what unconditional love is all about.…

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Tips For Exam Preparation

Tips For Exam Preparation

Examinations can be the worst part of studying for most students. Students are stressed out and if they have not been studying properly within the academic year, it looks like they are going to fail in every subject. Examinations may cause you to experience terrible anxiety, nightmares, a black-out even. Too much! Fear is not at all necessary; you still need to face examinations. Actually, you can get rid of all these matters, there are secrets behind acing an examination. It can be very simple if you study early and regularly. Here are some simple preparation tips for exams that you can follow.

a) Getting started

The earlier you start, the more time you will have to prepare for the exam. By starting early and studying on a regular basis, you will have a better opportunity to absorb the information.

b) Gather the material

Before getting things started, gather as many resources that you can that relate to your exam’s objectives. Running in search of study material would attract your concentration and force you to take more attention in your examinations.

c) Write up a study schedule

As the exam is around the corner, you will need to write up a study schedule to help you study effectively and minimize stress. Stick to your schedule, set short term goals for yourself and reward yourself when you keep achieving these goals.

d) Organize group study

Studying in a group helps if each member is studying for the same examination. They can help each other out if any doubts crop out and discuss the problems together. If solving the problems together, you can easily remember in your mind what you have learnt. In group study, they can keep each other motivated as well. Ensure that it is a small group of people, as too many people can just be a hindrance to problem solving.

e) Taking good care of yourself

Get enough sleep out of all preparation for exams, it is very important to have well mental and in physical condition for the exam. Most of them feel that sacrificing sleeping hours to study will benefit them. In fact, lack of sleep can cause a serious decrease in concentration levels.

Keep a positive attitude about your exam. Examinations are events that to prove and demonstrate your knowledge learnt. Do not panic and have faith in yourself. Good luck!

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Family Happiness

Unhealthy Relationships Come in Many Forms

When we think unhealthy relationship what first comes to mind? Most of us would think of domestic abuse-a woman in a romantic relationship being abused by her partner. But the truth is, unhealthy relationships happen all around us, every day, and are closer to home than we might think.

An unhealthy relationship does not have to be romantic in nature. It can be between friends, siblings, workmates, neighbours, or even parents and children. But no matter where it happens, the warning signs of an unhealthy relationship are universal. Here are some things to watch out for:

One person being manipulated or controlled by the other.

One person feeling pressured to change for the other.

One person is belittled by the other.

One person avoids certain topics or actions for fear of angering the other, or feels worried when they disagree with the other person.

Arguments are not settled fairly, or during violence there is verbal or physical abuse.

All of these are signs we would recognize in a romantic relationship, but they can be more difficult to recognize in one that is not romantic in nature. If you recognize any of these signs in one of your relationships, it may be time to take a step back and examine the relationship as a whole.

This can be more difficult, especially in the case of parents and children. After all, parents seem expected to exert some degree of control over their children, yet as they reach adulthood when does that move from loving guidance to the realm of the unhealthy relationship? Let’s take a look at Anna’s relationship with her mother, Pam.

Anna is twenty-one years old and a recent college graduate. She has temporarily moved back home to look for a job, and spends her days sending in applications and tailoring her resume. Once in a while she goes out with her friends. The economy is terrible, and Anna’s brief move back home gets longer and longer. Pam begins to belittle her, calling her lazy and telling her she does not believe she is really looking for a job. Feeling constantly diminished, Anna avoids her mother where she can, and becomes afraid to tell her about her job search for fear she’ll just be scorned some more. All the time there is stress, a desire for approval and unspoken feelings building up within Anna.

Although this is a mild example, Anna and Pam’s relationship is unhealthy, and if something between them does not change, their relationship has the potential to become permanently damaged.

In this kind of unhealthy relationship, violence is uncommon, and the best solution is often to talk things out with the other person. The ability to communicate is a great healing skill, when it enables you to voice how another’s behaviour makes you feel. The two of you can discuss what can be done to fix it. If you do not feel comfortable talking to the other person alone, invite a trusted friend or family member to join the discussion. If no agreement is reached, it may be time to consider ending the relationship. If the offending party is a family member, it may be best for everyone involved to avoid each other wherever possible, if things truly cannot be fixed. If they are a friend it is in your best interest to cut your losses and end the relationship altogether. So easy these days, just press delete on the mobile phone.

Remember, only you can know what is in your best interests, and, as with all unhealthy relationships, the first step to recovery is admitting there is a problem in the first place.…

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Obesity and Overweight – Things You Should Know

Obesity and Overweight – Things You Should Know

Obesity and Overweight

Overweight is having extra weight from muscle, bone, fat and / or water. Obesity is a high body weight with a large amount of body fat. Body mass index (BMI) is a useful measure of overweight and obesity, in terms of your height and weight. According to the National Health and Nutrition Examination Survey (NHANES) data from 2007-08, the prevalence of overweight and obesity in adults was 68 percent, approximately 204 million Americans (out of about 300 million). The children have become heavier and, due to family history, a diet of sugary foods, and lack of exercise.

In the past 30 years, the prevalence of childhood obesity has doubled among children aged 2-5 years, has tripled among youngsters aged 6 to 11, and has more than tripled among adolescents ages 12-19. To make matters worse, obesity in children has led to an increase in suicide. This is because of obesity can lead to the illness known to the world as depression. In turn, depression can and will ultimately lead to suicide. The percentage of overweight children in the United States is growing at an alarming rate, with 33 percent of children now considered overweight or obese. Amongst many, Obesity in the United States is considered an epidemic.

Many children spend less time exercising and more time watching TV, computer or game console. This is because all these quick and easy entertainment. And busy families today have less time to prepare nutritious meals and home. From fast food to electronics, quick and easy is the reality for many people in the new millennium. Preventing children from becoming overweight means adapting the way your family eats and exercises, and how to spend time together. Helping children a healthy lifestyle starts with parents who lead by example.

Childhood obesity in the United States has increased significantly, almost three times more in recent years. The condition is so bad that the government has continued to raise awareness programs and health units, even the smallest of cities. The National Football League (NFL) began a movement of young people’s health called Play 60. This campaign was designed specifically for children to get out and be physically active for at least 60 minutes a day. This campaign has been successful thus far, commercially and in actuality. The NFL players are the poster boys for the Play 60 campaign and are responsible for the events that take place.

Data on obesity in the United States suggest that approximately one quarter of U.S. children are obese or overweight. There are many causes of obesity in children and the list of problems that lead to alarming. Childhood obesity facts throughout the state of the world that 70 percent of children suffer from the problem of obesity, are required to develop at least one of heart disease in later life. childhood obesity statistics in America are increasing at an alarming rate and parents must be very careful about exactly what their children eat, whether it is healthy or not and how much to eat it.…

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Educational Toys and Pretend Play

Educational Toys and Pretend Play

Pretend play is a very important to healthy childhood development. It is known to researchers as “Sociodramatic Play” or “Imaginative Play”. It is a type of free play in which children engage in creative and imaginative social interactions. Pretend play has been shown to effectively promote the development of social, emotional, physical, and cognitive skills in children especially with autistic children.

Parents, teachers and or caregivers should create opportunities for children which allow their imagination to be released by…

Providing an environment that permits a child to explore every possibility without undue restraints

Let children express their ideas rather than imposing adult ideas upon them

Set up real life situations for solving problems

Allow a child the time to explore original ideas rather than what is popular

Help them work through the process of solving problems

Pretend play is the place where children carry out action plans, take on roles, and transform objects as they express their ideas and feelings about the world around them. Pretend play challenges children to see new solutions to life problems. In a sense it is “Child Brainstorming”, that is, spontaneous ideas and or solutions to solve problems. Researchers in the field of early childhood development have stated, children that do not play and use their imagination regularly when they are young may grow into anxious, socially maladjusted adults because problem solving can become a difficult task.

Educational toys provide support in the development of social, emotional, physical, and cognitive skills in children because many are designed to stimulate pretend play. They also provide a bridge for a child’s interaction with parents or caregiver. According to an article by the “American Academy of Pediatrics” when adults participate in the play of children, learning is enhanced. Parents are able to observe the skills their child currently has and also help expand those skills.

When choosing educational toys that promote pretend play look for toys that reflect real life situations, such as a kitchen set, rocket ships, various vehicles such as fire trucks, automobiles, airplanes, also action figures and various playhouses. Also be sure to check that the toys are safe and the right size for your child. Check their quality and durability so that they will stand up to heavy use because you don’t want to restrict play in order to preserve a fragile toy. Then think about how it fits in his/her general interests. Most important, make pretend play an event for both you and your child.…