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Love Mommy

Parents’ Involvement In Schools Is Critical

One way to help your child to succeed in school may be to drop by for a visit.

A little involvement can go a long way, say experts at National Parent Teacher Association (PTA). You don’t have to spend hours at school each week. Even a monthly visit can make a difference.

When parents get involved:

� Students have better attendance records.

� Students achieve higher test scores and grades.

� Students have higher graduation rates and are more likely to pursue higher education.

� Students build stronger relationships with parents.

According to National PTA, only one in four parents are actively involved in their children’s education. For working parents, that number drops to only one in nine.

“When parents take an active role in their children’s education, it has a very positive effect,” reports Warlene Gary, CEO of National PTA. “Parents need to stay involved from kindergarten through high school to assure that their children get the kind of education that will help them succeed.”

National PTA and The Advertising Council have launched a campaign encouraging parent involvement in schools. Through various forms of media, the campaign encourages parents to join PTA and offers a Web site to connect parents with simple tips and ideas to get involved in their children’s school and education.

Here are a few ways to get started:

� Talk to your child’s teacher. Let her know all about your child’s interests and ask how you can support learning at home.

� Plan a lunch date with your children in the school cafeteria.

� Attend parent-teacher conferences.

� Join the PTA.

� Go to school events such as back-to-school night.

� Keep current on school policies, schedules and rules.

� Attend school board meetings.

� Check your school’s Web site.

� Talk to your child’s school counselor if you have any concerns or questions.…

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Happy Family

I Saved My Marriage Remembering My Parents Divorce

I remember it like it was yesterday. My mom seemed to be in a big hurry, she was crying and throwing things into the trunk of the car. I asked her what was happening but all she said to me was, hurry up, get your little sister and get in, we’re leaving. Where are we going? I asked, but got no answer, she was not in the mood to talk. As I was getting my sister in the car, she saw that Mom was crying, so she started to cry as well. I didn’t understand what was happening, but I knew it wasn’t good, and I was afraid.
As we were backing out of the driveway, I saw Dad come to Moms window crying, begging her to please stay, please don’t go, and saying that he was very, very sorry. Mom just rolled up the window and ignored him. I had never seen my Dad cry before and the site of that happening terrified me. Dads don’t cry, even when they’re hurt, so I knew that something horrible had happened but I had no way of understanding what it was.
I didn’t know it at the time but my life changed that day. My parents ended up getting divorced and things like having a mother and a father around all the time never happened again. My sister and I went to live with mom, I don’t really know what Dad did, I don’t remember seeing him come around very often until some years later. Things were tough but we survived and managed to get by, but I know it was difficult for mom raising two children alone. I know she did the best she could but I always wished, and still do, that things could have been different.
Fast-forward twenty plus years, a marriage, and two young children later. I guess I hadn’t learned a damn thing because I found myself in the same position I remember my dad being in, as I flashed back to that fateful day. I was begging my wife to please stay, please don’t end our marriage, can we please try to make it work. And just like it was with my mom, my pleas just fell on deaf ears, she would have none of it. My wife and I were on our way towards divorce, and I felt helpless in trying to stop it.
I suppose I did learn something from my parent’s situation, and that was how I felt as a child going through a divorce. How much I missed my dad, how much I wished we were a family again. I wouldn’t wish it on anyone, let alone my own children. I didn’t want them to feel what I had felt, and how hard it was. There had to be something I could do, but what? I didn’t know anything about how to approach my predicament but I sure as hell was going to try.
It took everything I could muster; I stumbled many times and sometimes even thought it couldn’t be done. But I had to continue; I loved her and our kids so much that I had to make it work. I had to start all over again. I had to take her back to the time before we knew each other. I had to meet her again for the first time. I had to show her that I cared for her and wanted to be friends again. I asked her out on dates and courted her again. I showed her that I was 100% committed to her and our family and that she could trust and rely on me again. This process of starting over took time, but as the trust and caring between us grew we were drawn to each other again. The passion that we lost for each other reappeared, and we fell in love again. Yes it took time, but it was well worth it. You see, we are now a happy family again; dad, mom, two beautiful children and we plan on keeping it that way.…

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Parents, How to Move From Burnout to Bliss

After coaching several moms this week I felt the need to write this article. There are still too many people – both moms and dads, working too hard and having very little fun in their lives. Stress is huge for parents and they are finding that things in their personal lives are just piling up; they feel like, “How am I supposed to deal with all this AND be a good parent? I have no patience or energy left!”
Around 10 years ago I felt like I was falling apart. I was having amazing success with my students and their families, was receiving huge accolades from all of my administrators as well as school boards, and was hearing that parents were going to take their kids out of the school if their children wouldn’t be in Mrs. Kurt’s class. However, in the evenings and on weekends, I wasn’t experiencing this kind of success.
Most Friday nights, I would flop down on the sofa out of complete exhaustion and call out to my hubby to ask what type of take out we should order in. After eating I would either fall asleep leaving my husband to “enjoy” his Friday night alone or would end up arguing with him about something silly. On Saturdays, I would either break out in hives or my lips would swell up to triple their size. On a couple of occasions, the whole right side of my body went numb.
One night, my husband said, “This is enough! You have to figure out a way to change things and fix this.” Luckily, my personality is such that I always look for a solution to a problem.
I was fortunate that my husband put his foot down but in many families, both mom AND dad are stressed to the limit and are of little support to one another; they “just try and make do” and “get by”.
Today, I coach moms and dads on how to use my Life Circle™ Technique. This is the tool I developed for myself after my hubby put his foot down. It literally changed my life and in turn, my husband’s life. He saw such a difference in me that HE wanted to use the Life Circle™ too!
Although this tool can’t be taught in an article as short as this, some of the philosophies behind its success can be. Here’s how to start shifting yourself from burnout to bliss.
1. Slow down, stop taking things on because you think you “should”, just STOP! No more volunteering for things that you KNOW will stress you out or going to events that you KNOW you really don’t want to, or taking your kids to 3 or 4 after-school activities, just stop.
2. Be gentle on yourself – if you make your husband and child smile once a day, you’ve done your job
3. Ask for help – babysitting, cleaning, dinners
4. Get to bed! 10pm seems to be the ticket to having an evening and still getting enough rest.
5. Try no TV during the weekdays! You’ll be amazed at how you will fill up the time. Reading, talking to hubby over a glass of wine or cup of tea, organizing drawers, changing light bulbs… You won’t feel resentful because there is nothing else to do!
6. Play soothing or classical music in the house and burn calming aromatherapy oils such as lavender and peppermint.
When many stressful events occur at the same time, I’ve found that it’s a wake up call. If you constantly get sick or have things going wrong all the time, or often have unexpected situations arise, let that be your wake up call that, as my husband said, “Things need to change”. Start by applying the rules above and begin to see that life CAN be calm and blissful.…